There's so much in this post I could comment on, but I feel compelled to write about the woman's brother who died by suicide. It immediately reminded me of the book, The Bridge. Partially because of the setting, but also because you never know what impact you can have on someone's life. I like to think that I've saved a life or two with sharing my own stories or by being compassionate or by not taking a chance that my friend was exaggerating about how much Advil she took and calling 911. I think about my own suicide attempts. I don't ever want to tell her this because I don't want to put this pressure on her but my oldest niece is the reason I'm alive. The first time I started to overdose, I stopped myself partway through because I didn't want my niece to have a family history of an aunt who died by suicide. I didn't want to increase the statistical probability that she would have Depression and increase her risk of suicide. Mostly, I didn't want to be one more adult in her life who let her down by leaving. These motivations have prevented me from following through ever since. This is my story, though; I know that there are so many suffering without this kind of anchor.
Raw honesty time. I struggle in my current neighborhood because I want to be that light - that smiling stranger - when I walk my Gracie Blue. But it's a rougher neighborhood with a lot of transients, and while they maybe need it most, I'm scared that I'll be pegged as "soft" or an easy target, and as a single female living alone, I can't afford that. But I do smile and engage with those who give me the opportunity. There's a man who plays flute or saxophone on the corner by the grocery store and I always say hi to him and ask how he's doing and I say "God bless" because he's said it to me so I know that he's a believer. I talk to some of the guys who run the free cellphone booths down the street and I will talk to anyone who stops to ask about Gracie. If someone says that Gracie is a good dog or beautiful (both of which she is... usually), I light up and say thank you. Maybe Gracie Blue does the smiling for me. I hope she does. I hope it's enough.
Thanks for sharing Kelly. So many things in life seem to involve balance and nuance. Wanting to be a light in your neighborhood makes sense. Wanting to feel safe as you walk your dog makes sense too. One thought is maybe walking with a friend when you can. Either way, we can only do our best. I have no doubt you’re trying to do just that.
Thank you for this! It had me thinking about how I talk to my family. I know when their words are uplifting (or just the opposite) it has a tremendous effect on my day. I find that I’m actually kinder when talking to strangers or coworkers many days.
I know there have been studies on saying whatever is on your mind means you’re comfortable with family and close friends, but it’s good to remember that our words and actions can change a mood rather quickly - and for the better, hopefully!
In my experience, it can definitely be easier to talk to strangers or people I’m not as close to, just because there’s no tension or baggage. Thanks for sharing Aimee! Thanks for being here.
There's so much in this post I could comment on, but I feel compelled to write about the woman's brother who died by suicide. It immediately reminded me of the book, The Bridge. Partially because of the setting, but also because you never know what impact you can have on someone's life. I like to think that I've saved a life or two with sharing my own stories or by being compassionate or by not taking a chance that my friend was exaggerating about how much Advil she took and calling 911. I think about my own suicide attempts. I don't ever want to tell her this because I don't want to put this pressure on her but my oldest niece is the reason I'm alive. The first time I started to overdose, I stopped myself partway through because I didn't want my niece to have a family history of an aunt who died by suicide. I didn't want to increase the statistical probability that she would have Depression and increase her risk of suicide. Mostly, I didn't want to be one more adult in her life who let her down by leaving. These motivations have prevented me from following through ever since. This is my story, though; I know that there are so many suffering without this kind of anchor.
Raw honesty time. I struggle in my current neighborhood because I want to be that light - that smiling stranger - when I walk my Gracie Blue. But it's a rougher neighborhood with a lot of transients, and while they maybe need it most, I'm scared that I'll be pegged as "soft" or an easy target, and as a single female living alone, I can't afford that. But I do smile and engage with those who give me the opportunity. There's a man who plays flute or saxophone on the corner by the grocery store and I always say hi to him and ask how he's doing and I say "God bless" because he's said it to me so I know that he's a believer. I talk to some of the guys who run the free cellphone booths down the street and I will talk to anyone who stops to ask about Gracie. If someone says that Gracie is a good dog or beautiful (both of which she is... usually), I light up and say thank you. Maybe Gracie Blue does the smiling for me. I hope she does. I hope it's enough.
Thanks for sharing Kelly. So many things in life seem to involve balance and nuance. Wanting to be a light in your neighborhood makes sense. Wanting to feel safe as you walk your dog makes sense too. One thought is maybe walking with a friend when you can. Either way, we can only do our best. I have no doubt you’re trying to do just that.
Also I’m so glad you have your niece, and so glad she has you. 😊
Thank you for this! It had me thinking about how I talk to my family. I know when their words are uplifting (or just the opposite) it has a tremendous effect on my day. I find that I’m actually kinder when talking to strangers or coworkers many days.
I know there have been studies on saying whatever is on your mind means you’re comfortable with family and close friends, but it’s good to remember that our words and actions can change a mood rather quickly - and for the better, hopefully!
In my experience, it can definitely be easier to talk to strangers or people I’m not as close to, just because there’s no tension or baggage. Thanks for sharing Aimee! Thanks for being here.
U2’s your favourite band, huh? 😉
It’s true, it’s true. And I’ve been thinking of ya!